Roger Goodell—–Some thoughts

I do not know Roger Goodell.  I have never met him and I will probably never meet him. I trust and respect him as Commissioner. I have only seen Goodell on television.  I have good instincts about people. I believe he is a sensitive, honest, strong  man of integrity. He has been a good Commissioner who has been a good protector and builder of the NFL. He tries to do the right thing.  When he knows better, he does better. He seems to be operating from the right place.

I do not agree with all of the decisions that the NFL and Roger Goodell have made. When you make tough decisions, everyone is not going to agree with you. He makes tough decisions anyway.

All too often people only think in terms of black and white, pluses and minuses.  Life and truth are shades of grey.  It is in the shades of grey that Goodell operates in and operates well.  He is responsive and decisive even if you do not agree with the decision. I am one of the few people who think that the NFL got it wrong twice in the Ray Rice case.  I thought the first penalty was too severe and the second opinion was arbitrary and capricious responding to the news media. I thought the first decision was too severe because in the majority of states when there is a first offense of family violence and the couple wish to remain together and there are children, the public policy is to protect the family unit.  Charges are usually dismissed.  In Ray Rice’s case, because he is a public figure, he was charged with a felony and the charges were only reduced. Ray Rice did not have a prior offense and nor a subsequent offense. He had complied with the terms of punishment imposed.  This is why I think the second decision was arbitrary and capricious. Nothing had changed. The video was shown on television.  It was graphic and did not look good.  I had imagined a much worse situation when I first saw her unconscious.  Ray Rice’s action was indefensible.  This incident was not consistent with his prior behavior so I immediately assumed that he was high on alcohol or something.  This does not excuse him.  However, the change the punishment without a second event was arbitrary and capricious.  The decision was not consistent with current policy or the past policy.  Ray had not committed any more crimes.  Goodell and the NFL’s change in punishment was not consistent. Goodell, the NFL and Ray Rice were under attack.  Everyone was wrong.  Perhaps if the punishment had been more like basketball (6 or 7 games for fighting or blows) the public would have accepted it.  I do not know. Ray Rice did not commit an offense in the game of football. His conduct was personal with his girlfriend at the time.  If he is smart, he will continue to comply with his punishment and his charges will be dismissed and expunged.  He and his wife clearly needed therapy.  They do not know how to fight.  One of my rules for how to fight is that neither party can touch the other in any way in a dispute.  If things are escalating out of control and they cannot control themselves, one of both must leave for a time. I teach the parties how to communicate and I have rules about this.  There are rules that neither party in a fight must ever violate. They need to continue therapy. Communication skills can be taught.

I can understand how Goodell made his decision even if I do not agree with it.  Law enforcement had imposed punishment and Ray had expressed remorse for his conduct.  Everyone saw something different when they looked at the video.  I saw and heard two stupid people performing in front of a camera who appeared out of control.  The AP video have them swearing at each other and her spitting on him and shoving him.  Our local news media have her showing him and him hitting her with his left hand one time.  Someone says he hit her twice.  I saw one blow. What I saw looked like he did not intend the consequence but he intended to slap or hit her. He should not have laid his hand on her other than to embrace her or restrain her arms. He could not leave the elevator.  It does not matter to me whether Goodell saw the tape or not.  He would not know what to make of it.  I am not sure any Commissioner would have known what to make of it.  He cold corked her.  Dragging her from the elevator was graphic enough. He had to operate in the shade of grey with media all over him.  Law enforcement had imposed punishment. Two games is a lot of money to Ray and affects the team.  I think he was exercising a balancing act. Probably six or seven games would have been better. ( Look even I am now changing my prior opinion about punishment.  It happens.  This is a complicated situation.) I think the decision of the Ravens was in response to the media.  Ray Rice and his behavior had not changed.  It had just gone more public and gotten more exposure. They were embarrassed.  Family violence is shameful. There are a lot of personal behaviors that are shameful that are tolerated in athletes, i.e. being married and cheating multiple times, getting multiple women pregnant that you do not marry, brushes with law enforcement, etc.  Commissioners in all leagues operate in shades of grey.

Since Roger Goodell has been Commissioner, the NFL reports indicate that there have been 47 cases of domestic violence.  The punishment imposed has been a  one to two game suspension.  Rice’s suspension was consistent with this. Husband and wives have been having fights and fusses since cave man days.  This is a cultural and national problem.  It cannot be corrected with the Ray Rice case.  This is not fair to him. In some cultures even today, the husband can stone the woman to death without consequences. In other cultrues the husband may beat the wife and the children without consequence.  America’s views on family violence have changed over time. Women’ s rights are not protected in this country.  I recently had a case in which the U.S. Supreme Court by its non action indicated that if you are Black, poor and female in this country, the laws and constitution will not be enforced in your case.  Nobody screamed that this was wrong.  Criminal behavior on the part of law enforcement and the courts was sanctioned by the highest court in this land against a citizen and nobody uttered a peep.  The female was Black.  When it gets close to home or in our face, we see the harm.  We must get to the point that when we see or hear wrong, we speak up.

As I said before, whether Goodell saw the tape before he made his original decision is irrelevant to me. He is a man of integrity and operates from a good place.  When he knows better, he does better.  He has demonstrated this in a number of areas—youth programs for athletes, head injuries and safety in sports, etc.   He has been a good commissioner. He has been a good protector of the NFL and players.  I respect him even when I do not agree with him.